Cabin crew Over 35 and still trying for a baby!

Today is day 31 of the cycle and if I don't come on today I will really think I am pregnant. :)
Well; I still don't want to get too excited as I usually do come on about day 30-31 but I had sex again last night to try and hurry up the process and nothing... usually that would have brought it on if it was due; this morning nothing again ; HOWEVER; I have got cramps since about 6am and its 10am now and they havent really stopped so it could be that its on its way but just taking time. :( in which case the disappointment will be a nightmare. I'm so fed up and yet so hopeful every single month ; I have tried every month not to pay too much attention to "signs" but I can't help it.
I had very little boob pain till just 10days ago; Its not sore sore; its just there ; like they are not sore to the touch like they usually are but definately achey. My back has been quite achey on and off. See usually the boob pain is at a different time of the month and heres me; getting excited about a little change even though I have cramps AND have taken a test and it was Negative on day 28!!!!! I set myself up for this dissapointment; really I do.
I will see by tonight if nothing happens I will be going out for another test. :D

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Is_cramping_an_early_sign_of_pregnancy


I have this link but I have seen it before from a previous time when I thought I was pregnant despite cramping.

Cabin crew Over 35 and still trying for a baby!

Ok I am up to day 30 of my cycle; I had a weird feeling I was pregnant a few days ago so I took a test on day 28 ; It was negative!!!!! Again!!!!! Today or tomorrow I am due on.
I just thought because I had sore boobs and Still have sore boobs even though its day 30. Which I thought was odd. Also I had period cramps about  a week ago which again I found odd; and also a little bit of back pain. I am being super sensitive to things though in general because I am so desperate to get pregnant before Christmas so I can if I want get out of going to Nigeria and working Christmas day.
So ; I was lying in bed this morning and started getting the usual cramps I get when I am about to come on; so I was really fed up this morning; so for about an hour or two I'm expecting it ; so I thought ( and this is maybe too much information) but I thought I'll have sex to bring it on and it will put me out of my misery and end all speculation.... but it didnt come and now I am not getting any cramps and it hasnt come and its been 5hrs at least!!!! Could this be it??? or am I just winding myself up again and going to be so disappointed tomorrow or late tonight.
We shall just have to wait and see. I will update it again tomorrow.
;)

Cabin crew Over 35 and still trying for a baby!

I think its about day 17 of the never ending cycle of trying for a baby; its month 16 of trying.
I shouldn't complain as I flew with a lovely lady last week; who tried IVF; and it was unsucessful; she said she wasted so much time not going for it sooner. Now she is 40.
She did all the stuff I have done. The supplements; the legs in the air; ovulation test kits all the usual; changed diet etc... then went to an NHS person who did all the tests like me; all normal ; she went for adpotion but was turned down on account of her husband being Carribean and she is white and the kid was not right ethnic origin or something. Terrible. NOW her next step is going to America next year However; her hubby was turned down for a visa; and she obviously needs him there for his sperm and she is not taking anyone elses.
I really feel for her so cant really complain about my situation although it is dissapointing.
So I was "ovulating " a few days ago. I think....
Day 14 I took a test it was neg; and day 15 the line was only barely marginally darker; so I think I ovualted.... and couldnt check on day 16 as I ran out of tests. anyways I was in Baltimore on day 16. But we had sex on the morning of day 15 as I was off to Baltimore later that morning and I didnt really have a lot of time to keep my legs up either. 5mins tops as I had to pack ...lol
The boob soreness is not affecting me this month but it may kick in ;in a few days. Its unusual as I have had very bad boob soreness every month for the last year. They're itchy all the time though for months and months !
Been wondering if dehydration is not helping me get pregnant; flying is very dehydrating!! And I dont drink enough; I struggle to drink water; I drink loads of tea and red wine( well about a glass with dinner most nights. :D but very little else; however I have made a concerted effort to drink more water this month and its speeded up my metabolism which is brilliant as I could have gone 2-3 sometimes 4 days without going to the loo and we eat loads of veg  and very little processed foods so I was getting down not losing any weight but although I am now same on the scales I have definately got no bloat and everything fits better . So happy days!!!!
I think maybe if I keep drinking the water; keep up what I am doing I will be pregnant by Feb .. fingers crossed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Back to square one!! again

Deep deep sigh.....
I have been meaning to update this for well over a week. I had secretly been convincing myself again last month that this had been the month and it wasn't again.... I mean its good I suppose that I'm positive every month but its waning.
I need a boost; I have litterally run out of problems that could be wrong But... I was flying last week with a girl who is 30- 6 yrs my junior and one of the girls was like " oh you better get a move on; you'll never fall pregnant with flying" and Im like "shiiiiiiiiittttt!!!!!
Maybe it is a lot to do with it... but there are other girls who seem to get pregnant; although come to think of it I hear more stories of people in my job relentlessly trying than getting pregnant.
So anyway; I digress; I came on last week; day or two later my sis has the most adorable pics on facebook of her baby son watching the fireworks; and it breaks my heart; I wish it was me sharing those moments. My profile pic is of my wee nephew ; I just adore him. It has to happen soon and I would love to know if this IS a flying issue. I could leave a job I love and realise its just one of those things; it should happen in the next few months; it HAS to..
:(

Cabin crew Over 35 and still trying for a baby!

Its day..... 26 of the cycle; I do again have the sore boobs; which I've had now for a few days but I get it every month so have stopped getting 'excited' now at sore boobs. Like; I don't think when I am actually pregnant I will know the level of sore boobs difference. It hurts walking downstairs for Gods sake! .. and I don't have particularly big boobs or anything that are bouncing about by merely walking downstairs.
Anyhooo I digress;  Have been away with a fantastic crew last few days; again lots of older Mums. In fact last week I was at playgroup with my sisters baby; we were chatting to a 27yr old on her 3rd baby but she said the last 2 took 14-16 months respectively after having been on the pill... I do think it has a LOT to do with my issues falling pregnant. Of course flying doesn't help my body clock at all.
So these crew I flew with; they are not shy about details; we are a very open bunch; she said; ( she has two boys) she fell pregnant with her youngest at 39 and  her words were... and bear in mind we were in a busy restaurant and she is very loud with a very strong Welsh accent " Well; when you go for a wee stick your fingers inside and if you put your thumb and finger together and it sticks together a bit like chewing gum then you need to have a shag basically!"


Firstly what having a wee has to do with it I will never know thoughts of wee fingers springs to mind... She repeated this advise to me at least 3 times throughout the trip... " now don't forget to stick your fingers in your fanny..." lol Nutter.
Also been flying with so many childless women; who have chosen career over babies and now regret it. Because back in the day you'd lose your job flying once you had kids. So sad really. This particular lady is now late 50's and lamenting over an ex boyfriend who she split up with over a year ago; desperately wanting a text to say why... why have you forsaken me?? Back story is he is married... 2 kids... and she looks about 10yrs older than her years and is a bit highly strung and over emotional... so....... I dunno... she is baffled !!!
God love her.
back to the topic in hand though... I have no more symptoms of anything aside from the usual sore boobs.
Will know on Sunday but this month; which is almost a first I have no feeling that this is the month, like I normally do.
Will update again in a day or so.

Trying for a baby Diary - a year on. A Cabin Crew's struggle

Hi again;
I am in Boston now ; the day I am supposed to be ovulating; I have booked off 3 days each month in annual leave for the coming 5 months so as I'm in the country when it matters. Left yesterday but will be home tomorrow so we had a go at like 4am yesterday morning before we went to our respective jobs.
My intention was not to do this of course but I had only landed from New York the previous morning and was so knackered I was in bed for 9pm; and fell asleep as he was chatting; couldn't have even thought about sex with the cloud of having to get up and go to Boston in the morning looming over me. However; it was that or waiting another month for a "shot" so it must have woken me up in the middle of the night; "the fear" of losing out and going through the now all too familiar dissapointment.
So I woke him up ; we didn't even speak; before; during or after. ;) it was just the unspoken; I'm awake; I've woken you up; its obvious by how I woke you up I want sex and so we did; It was pretty good too!! Exhausted afterward just lay there till we both fell back asleep. Needless to say he got up in the morning all chirpy and I got my breakfast all ready for me when I came down the stairs.
Anyhoooo that was beginning of day 14. I usually ovulate day 15 OR 16 so.. I will do the test ( ovulation test) when I land on Sunday ( day 16) and if its not too late I will go for it again. I will be so shattered and SO not in the mood but I have to.... sighs.
I really thought I would have been pregnant by the Summer; well; if I'm honest I really thought by March April last year! But then I put it back to Summer; now my milestone is Christmas. I'm sure you all know where I'm coming from with this one. I do not want to be here in January saying my new milestone is Easter....
Keep everything crossed for me. ( except your legs. ;) of course)
I made the silly mistake; as I always do of telling the girl I'm working alongside that I'm trying. She keeps saying ; "don't lift that; or oooh you are eating for two now " and all this crap. I'm so over getting excited about the thoughts that I might be due to so many previous dissapointments 14months and counting. She got pregnant at aged 39; she thought it was never going to happen for her and wasn't trying at the time and said she was drunk; it was a Christmas concieved baby.
Trying not to get my hopes up; but I am a positive person by and large and I do always get excited towards the end of the month... so will keep you posted

Pregnancy from day one ( conception-to birth)

Well as for I'm sure many of you ; I am back to square one.
I got the results of my test just before my holiday and everything Was normal; so I am as the doctor said Well within the normal range with the hormones; I'm still ovulating and all that; so it made me so much more excited to be going on holidays with the hopes that whilst out there I'd get the good news ; I packed a test and everything. So imagine the dissapointment when I came on ; bang on time as well on day 30. Fell out with my partner as well because he was so moody;  maybe just stressed but he was very stressed and snapping at waiters and all sorts; maybe its affecting him too. Needless to say we made up but for about 2 days I was about to put a pillow over him when he was asleep.

I was gutted; as ; as usual I'd convinced myself " its definately this month"
I did however , as I always do is pick myself up; because I do have the good news that there's nothing wrong with either of us. But.. 14months off the pill now and its dragging.

Any one out there who is still trying; you should definately go for the blood tests as it does give you more hope.
I have now also bought this book about boosting fertility; its pretty good actually saying how your diet will actually improve the quality of your eggs etc... loads of great tips; but we already eat all the oily fish; veggies etc.... So really we do everything SO right.
I have booked loads of time off work; esp at ovulation times for the next 5months so theres no excuse for timing to be out.
Would love to hear from people going through this stage.

Pregnancy from day one ( conception-to birth)

Well today is day 27 of my cycle; its getting very close to crunch time; I will be calling the docs to see if I get any results of my blood test tomorrow; to see if I am in fact barren and then this will be a very different blog indeed.

No more symptoms as such; I still have tender boobs but its normal for me at this time of the month.. they've been funny all month this month. Even before I was ovulating; but nothing really out of the ordinary; the only thing I found is Im not enjoying red wine as much last few weeks but that could be a fluke.

Will know soon
Excited!!!!!!

Pregnancy from day one ( conception-to birth)

Hi

today would be.... day 23 of my cycle. I wasn't feeling anything up till today ; but I do have sore-ish boobs; getting increasingly sore as the morning goes on. I had an awful sleep last night. My partner has now taken to making a munching noise in his sleep ; on top of the snoring and rolling over to my side of the bed AND that it was uncharacteristically warm in London last night. So I'm tired and have sore boobs; and actually a bit of back ache...
I've already convinced myself I'm pregnant; but I do this every month as soon as I get any wee twinge of anything; I'm in a bad mood; must mean I'm hormonal and pregnant; I get a stitch in my side; oh; that'll be implantation -I'm definitely pregnant. As so it goes on like this. So we'll see; I will have a much better idea in a few days.
Incidentally;  I get sore boobs every month about a week before I'm due on and kind of during those few days. Generally I'm quite lucky and it only lasts 2 -3days and I actually don't get PMT like other girls. I don't get weepy; or irrational or really moody. Really..... honest :)

I am off to Hong Kong tonight and internet although Im sure its widely available in Hong Kong ; I don't think I will blog from an internet cafe... I'll be back Tuesday and then off on hols on Wednesday night. Really need this break.

Check in with me in a few days and I will give you my new list of symptoms; imagined pregnancy or just plain period cramps etc... Keep everything crossed for me guys. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pregnancy from day one ( conception-to birth)

NB* I started this diary a week ago so the first blog will be kind of long as it covers a week from conception ( fingers crossed) This is the journey of a 36yr old trying for a baby for 13months..  

I am in bed; watching the Wright Stuff ; having had my legs in the air since Daybreak; ( the show-) not since 7am.   I've whipped away the pillows a little while ago as I really needed a cuppa and I felt like lying in this position was giving me heartburn..
My story so far is....
I went off the pill in August 2010 when my sister had a baby; I was always fairly broody but that just sent me over the edge.  He's now 1yr and one month and I'm still doing the  " oh; my boobs are sore and I'm really knackered; I'm definitely pregnant this month!!!!" Only to come on ...yet again. Sound familiar??

Going off the pill after close to 16yrs on it was weird as I thought it would upset my whole social calender and ruin holidays and such like but its OK ladies; it generally works out 30 day cycles.  I'm  a year on and I'm pretty clockwork. 31 days.

In December of 2010 I went for an Ultrascan... in Bangkok.  The scan was basic; she said; everything ( the ovaries) looked normal but also said; 'that says nothing about the function'.

 I should mention that I am cabin crew; in other words a trolley dolley;  whatever it is you want to call it. Every flight I have, I have a conversation with new crew; men and women who are in more or less the same position as me; trying for a baby; have tried and been successful; unsuccessful ; miscarriages and all sorts.

I may have a new story every week or so on their struggles too. Depending on if I can keep this up or I'm just having a rant today. I will also; if I don't get busted; tell you how much my partner supports or annoys me along the way and "IF" I get pregnant will do the same and you can follow our ups and downs.

I get this ovulation kit every month; and MOSTLY.. not every month ... I ovualte. Its generally about day 15 or 16 counted from the first day I see blood, as I put it. Every 4 or 5months I don't get that line; but to be fair I did run out of tests one month by day 17 so didn't try day 18; so you never know??

My Partner has some app on his phone which never really seems to get it right and he is convinced his app is the authority on dates; despite it being a week out last month. That's typical him though.

I digress; I do have a tendancy to go off at a tangent. I wasn't ovulating yesterday; according to the stick but to be fair; it was day 14; today is day 15 and it 'should' be today. I will check about lunchtime as they say the morning pee can give a false positive. I am off to L.A tomorrow though; and I know a woman; same age as me who is also trying but she has a condition and is worried she will have problems ;  I flew with her about 4-5months ago she was just starting to try and the fact that she is on my flight means she is still trying as you have to be grounded ( ground duties rather than flying duties)  when you get pregnant.

After a year of talking to people... many many people ; I feel I have heard  all the different methods; times; positions; however ; so far it hasn't happened  so mabye something is medically wrong ;maybe its flying for a living or just general stuff.
 Next week I have to go for that day 21 blood test thing; and also it checks if I am going in to early menopause.....  so will let you know how that goes too.  I've wanted to get down a form of diary that hopefully I can look back on some day and say; "This is the journey I've gone on ; trying to make you. :) "

NEXT DAY

  Day 15 of my cycle;  I'm going to do the ovulation test strip now; have not needed a pee for ages.

It better be today as I have one more chance tonight and then I'm away to L.A for 3days and the ship will have sailed. 

BRB.

Ok Good news is I'm at least ovulating; bad news is I have to have sex AGAIN this evening/tonight. lol. 

It was a piece of cake at the beginning; all the excitement of trying; but now; I have this  small window of opportunity to do it and he'll come in from work; we'll have dinner; a few glasses of wine maybe; watch something really crap on the telly ; go upstairs and he'll brush his teeth in the bathroom; and I can hear it; I am weird; I have a weird phobia about the sound of teeth being brushed; it freaks me out.

 Like when a Colgate ad comes on I have to block my ears ; so the sound of him brushing his teeth in the mornings and nights really makes me cringe. I know; I need therapy.  I actually don't like to see anyone brushing their teeth on T.V. all foaming at the mouth like Kujo or something... yuck!!!!

So its not unusual to see me these days legs at a 45degree angle and my fingers stuffed in my ears ; tres sexy non??? 

So.. thats it from me for a couple of days as I won't be able to blog when I'm away this time. But when I get back I will give you the low down on the last few days and any of my normal imaginary symptoms I get when I am convinced I am pregnant. I have my test when I get back the FSH ; and Progesterone test and LH test; Have no clue really what it all means but will fill you in when I know more. 

5 DAYS LATER day 21 of cycle 

Ok today is the day of the blood tests; I googled it all last night; its meant to check hormones; and to detect early menopause and all that. Its so scary really; I know a girl/woman; she went in to menopause at age 37 and is devastated she can't have a baby. 

So after much trepidation I went for the test and it was all over in 2 mins; kind of an anti-climax. There were loads of people getting blood; and you take a ticket no ; like when you go to a deli counter. Its litterally a conveyor belt of everyone else getting random blood test; and heres me thinking Id have a nice wee chat with a fertility nurse/doctor and get the lowdown about what was going on ; when in reality its a young nurse taking a sample of your blood in one vial and getting a marker to write your name and its a " thanks very much; you're done" "OH!!" 

Well; they said it would be a week for the results but I know better as any x-ray; test result I have EVER had in our surgery is at least 2-3 weeks ; don't know if thats common or just my surgery. I will call in on Wed but I won't be surprised if they say call back next week. I am off on holiday anyhow; and could actually find out over there that I am pregnant.